Implicit judgments shape perceptions, hinder relationships. Confirmation bias fuels negativity, sabotages improvement.
Evaluate judgments for usefulness, not justification. Negative judgments stem from avoidance of emotions. Focus on fuel, not flames. Avoid reactive escalation.
She takes a more extreme position when she's invalidated and contradicted, as do I. I can modify this with compassion and attempts to reconcile our perspectives rather than have mine dominate.
She's used to being unheard and overruled, which makes her require adrenaline to be heard.
Date intentionally: Reflect on yourself, identify patterns, seek feedback, overcome blindspots, and find your dream relationship.
She feels attacked when we talk due to the history of our interactions. I won't accuse, interrogate, or act superior.
Commit to a loving relationship, not a person. If they don't fit, move on.
She's mildly depressed. I can help by having more positive regard for her and focusing on improvement rather than blame and criticism.
Emotions have their own logic to protect and defend well-being. Emotional and intellectual logic reconcile when partners support each other's well-being.
Unconscious coping habits harm relationships. Blaming causes hurtful exchanges.